Halloween and the art of scaring ourselves

I’m sitting in the waiting room of my son’s speech therapist and reading articles on self-help. Yes, I read those too. I’m not finding an article I’m looking for, so my mind begins to wander. With Halloween approaching I’m finding myself in discussions with my twelve-year-old about the purpose of Halloween. My guy is easily frightened and seems to allow his imagination to go to those things that freak him out as easily as walking through a door. But don’t we all do that? Our minds are naturally on the alert for things to go wrong or astray. If we didn’t have this capability, we would have blithely succumbed to the saber-toothed cat long ago.  We make a list of dreams, desires, or goals and immediately go to why it won’t work or why we are incapable of achieving them. The trap is staying there. The capability to see danger coming is supposed to come hand in hand with cognitively deducing the best ways of avoiding said peril.  So, don’t stay there. I know, it’s really easy to find yourself shutting yourself down before you even get started, but are these “worst-case scenarios” which we come up with really accurate of our circumstance? Is there really no work around? I’m betting either they’re not or there is a work around. Give yourself the benefit of the doubt. Ok, maybe not today, but in a year’s time? Maybe. Are you willing to risk it?

Speaking of risk, will the risk really be that big? With careful planning and proper set-up, we can achieve almost anything, thereby reducing the risk. Maybe you need more education. Maybe more funds. These things are attainable if you work them into your plan. Research, organize, and create a workable plan. If you need more education, how could you go about it? Can you do this full time or part time? More money? How much can you save by not going you fast food for lunch every day for three months? How much can you save if you only drink alcohol on the weekend? Or my personal favorite, every payday take 10% of what is in your checking account and put it in savings. If you find you continually dip into savings, then you are living beyond your means. It is time to cut back. There are many ways to cut back before you even begin to consider extra income sources. Both of which markedly reduces the financial risk.

Do you need more time? This gets to be a challenge, especially if you have family and work obligations; but it can be done. Its mostly about communication and setting boundaries. Communication about boundaries is of the utmost importance.  Figure out what you need to support your goals and then let those around you, who can assist you, know. This also means saying “no” to some as you need to carve out time for you to attend to your goals.

Are you scared yet? Take a deep breath. Remember this is important to you. You deserve this. You can do this. Make a plan. Take it one step at a time. We are intelligent beings. Don’t be afraid to use it.