Balance

Are you on the verge of tears? Do you feel overwhelmed by your life? Maybe you just want to crawl into a hole and hope all your responsibilities go away. We all feel this from time to time; but if you feel this all of the time then its time to find a good therapist that can help you process these feelings properly. If, on the other hand, you find yourself in this place occasionally; it could be your life or your unconscious telling you its time for a change. It’s easy to find ourselves here. Whether its from the inability to say no or an out of whack care taking mode, we find ourselves “captain” of the PTA, “master” of the soccer league, or taking every job at work because “no one” can do it as well as you. In every case, we just want to “help”. Unfortunately, we wind up with so much on our plate that we don’t do any of the jobs adequately and we can do ourselves physical harm if we live in that stressful place all of the time. That sense of heightened anxiety you feel is a reminder that you don’t have to do it all. Let someone else save the company for a change. Step back and look at your life. Make a list of everything that you do and honestly look at it because at this point something’s got to give. If its not your schedule, it will be you. You do no one any good, especially those who do depend on you if you wind up out of the picture.
It’s really about taking care. In 2006, Carol McCloud published a children’s book called, Have You Filled a Bucket Today?: A Guide to Daily Happiness for Kids. Its message still applies even if you’re not a child. Basically, it advises self-care before other care. I know. We are taught to put others before us but just like in the event of an airline emergency, we are told to don our oxygen mask before assisting those in our care. One, it demonstrates how to do it; and two, it keeps them from watching us die from lack of oxygen. Win-win. So do some self-care. How many of those items on your list could just as easily be done by others? No one is going to begrudge you some R&R or “you” time because they know you can’t adequately take care of others without taking care of yourself first.
Finding balance between the time and energy you spend on yourself and others will ease that anxiety enough that you truly can do anything.